It's my last night in my apartment and while I should be packing a few final things before the movers arrive in a couple hours, instead I find myself compelled to sit at my desk one last time and blog. I've begun to feel quite nostalgic about my apartment in the last few weeks as I started the process of dismantling it and packing it up. In leaving, I realized just how much this place has meant to me over the past two years. And so, I thought, what better way to spend my last night here than taking a little trip down memory lane and paying proper tribute to my beloved 3121. I am going to miss you dear friend...
I've lived in 3121 a few months shy of two years, and while I remember the day I moved in like it was yesterday, I feel like I lived an entire lifetime here. The person who walked through the door the first day is a very different person than the one who will be locking up tomorrow. I came into this apartment absolutely terrified. I was newly separated from my (now ex) husband, I was living on a new side of town where I didn't know anyone, and for the first time in my 28 years, I was living alone. I feigned excitement at the prospect of having my own place and getting a little space from my husband. I reasoned that once we did this he would quickly see what a mistake the separation was, and we'd go back to living happily ever after. Happily, this never happened. I can say that now, but it didn't come easy. The first seven or so months here found me vacillating between despair and hope. As I tried to untangle myself from our marriage I began to realize how far I had strayed from the person I once was. It wasn't until I separated myself from the man I'd spent almost every day of the previous 8 years with, that I started to figure out who I was. And so began my transformation.
I brought little with me into the apartment, which proved to be a wise decision. Although my family and friends thought I was crazy for selling our house and most of the things we had in it, I knew in my heart it was the right thing to do. I suppose maybe I knew even then that things would never work out and I would need a new beginning. I brought the bare minimum from my old life, and thus didn't have many constant reminders of that old life. Instead, I had the opportunity to begin a new life, and one that was mine alone. I took months to find the perfect couch, I sanded and repainted all the furniture I brought with me, and as I found them I bought new things to fill in the spaces. The things felt like me. The more I surrounded myself with the things I loved, and the things that I felt better represented who I was, the more at home I felt.
I also began to make new friends. New friendships can be hard, but mine flourished. I was eager to fill my life with people who didn't know me as part of a couple, but as my own person. I began to realize close friendships were a huge part of my life I had previously sacrificed, but one that I wouldn't be willing to sacrifice any more. My friends are some of the most important people in my life, and I value their companionship a great deal. This would be one of the cornerstones of my new life.
The times I spent here in 3121 with my friends were some of the greatest of my life. We went through good times and bad here. When I was down, my friends brought me back up. When I struggled, they supported me and reminded me of how far I'd come. But mostly, we just had a great time! Proudly, 3121 became the official hang-out spot. Instead of going out, we'd come here. Instead of going to someone else's place, we'd come here. We drank, we ate, we talked, we laughed, we solved all the world's problems, and we created a few new ones. In the company of my friends I felt like I was finally becoming the person who I'd always needed to be.
The memories I have of the times I spent with people here in 3121 are priceless. Whether they were ecstatic or good or mediocre or devastating, they all moved me to where I am now, which is a woman who knows who she is and what she wants and is about to embark on her next great adventure!
I know that many of you read my blog and never leave comments, but I'd love to ask you to make an exception to that lurking rule and leave me a comment if you've been to 3121 with a memory or a tribute of your own!
to do #122: pay tribute to my beloved apartment.
ps, I want to thank, from the bottom of my heart, three very special people who made my last two nights here so memorable and so special. You know who you are, but please know that it meant the world to me. :)
