You may recall a few weeks ago I was up against a deadline on traffic school, and decided to go to a concert instead. Lucky for me, the court took pity and gave me an extension. Not wanting to get myself in the same predicament, I buckled down and spent the better part of the afternoon and evening doing online traffic school. The price I paid for speeding is that I've wasted a perfectly nice Sunday evening, and that I am utterly exhausted. Traffic school is boring as hell but with online traffic school you actually have to pay attention because the quizzes can be pretty tough! I'm a fast reader, and it's taken me approximately four hours to complete six sections. I still have four sections to go. Ugh. It has been entertaining though. I started to really like online traffic school in section three where it got very zen-like, saying things like:Focus on where your power is. Your power lies in your ability to control what you do, not what others do. So, instead, concentrate on being removed from the outside world and move into the inside world of peace and tranquility. Stay in the "eye of the storm." When the hurricane is blowing at its fiercest, the inside center of the storm is calm and serene. Don't go outside, where you have no control. Stay inside in the "eye of the storm," where you have control. Stay in your "center."
It even amused me at times with things like:
Drivers who focus only on the bumper in front of them join the "Stupid Club." The Stupid Club gathers members who do dumb things and have crashes.
And of course there were many 'helpful' suggestions like:
If you tend to be oblivious when driving, one good suggestion is to place an easily seen note on your visor that says, "Am I paying attention?"
Alas, it is still boring and I'm only 60% of the way through. I'm too tired to continue tonight, and the thought of more traffic school tomorrow has me so excited I can hardly wait to go to bed. The lesson in this? Don't break the law. As I learned tonight, the average person breaks 400 traffic laws before they get caught. I suppose after 14 years of driving my number was up.
to do #307: attend online traffic school
UPDATE: I passed my final exam with a 100% score! What can I say, I'm a perfectionist, even in traffic school.
3 comments:
I'm so glad you made it through!
lol @ the perfectionist. I guess another who kills a scorpion with a chappal(flats) has got to be one. :P
Congratulations CLM! In my original drivers' ed course, we spent more time watching the Simpsons than learning about driving, so I missed out on helpful hints like visor post-its. Thanks for cluing me in :)
The first quote is so beautiful that I might have it tattooed on my thigh.
I do find it strange, however, that the DMV is giving unsolicited "life-philosophy" through on-line traffic school. I mean, isn't it a little late now? Maybe this information would be better served if we heard it during school, you know, the whole formative years thing. That might be a better time for the State to analyze and dissect power, as with this trenchant line: "Focus on where your power is. Your power lies in your ability to control what you do, not what others do." Beautiful advice. But sadly I've always operated on the opposite assumption: that power lies in my ability to control others!
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